The Only Writing Advice You Need Right Now

On the first Monday of the Blog Me Maybe blogfest I had these grand ideas of giving you some really good writing advice. (Because that’s what the schedule calls for and I’m a nerdy rule-follower.)

But then I had the most productive writing weekend ever, and I spent so much time working on my WIP that I didn’t have time to write some brilliant musings on the craft. And I’m 67 percent sure the musings, had I spent time on them, would have been brilliant.

So in light of my super productive weekend, I give you some thoughts on how to write well:

1. Close Twitter. No, don’t minimize it—Click. It. Shut.
2. Ban yourself from Facebook. (Trust me, all you’re missing is updates like, Rain again! Boooo. :( and Ur so selfish. U know who u r! Grr.)
3. Stay away from the Internet. If you need to research something, make a note then go back when going online isn’t punishable by 50 push-ups.
4. Tell everyone you know that you have to work over the weekend. If they give you a hard time for working on your “hobby,” pretend you’re catching up on the day job.
5. Hide your cell under a few blankets and pretend you don’t hear it when it rings.
6. Don’t answer the doorbell.
7. Let your e-mails pile up. If that stresses you out, seek immediate medical attention.
8. Write.

And that’s it.

Oh, and if you’re feeling cheated because I didn’t really give you advice on how to write, check out this post on your best writing advice or this post on your outlining tips. See? I’m the kind of evil genius who uses your intelligence to make me look more intelligent. It’s amazing.

On that note, leave a writing tip in the comments for your fellow writers.